It is just unbelievable and almost unreal how suspicion, negative thoughts and perceptions have changed the way we love each other, I mean my wife and I.
No, we have never stopped loving each other. It is just that her biology, physiology and not to mention her hormone levels, I guess that had somewhat soured our husband-and-wife intimate relationship.
She had somewhat lost interest, while I had not! I never said that we had completely stopped performing the ritual. We still did it, but with less vigour and volunteerism. It had become a one-sided affair most of the time and almost robotic to say the least.
Contrary to the popular saying, absence sickened, instead of making the hearts grow fonder!
Suddenly I became a monster. Several minutes delay in responding to her sms or call was interpreted as being with someone else. Giggles and voices of the opposite sex caught on while we were talking over the hp were taken as I was having dinner or good times with the opposite gender.
It was difficult and outright mentally-disturbing when here I was doing things, sitting watching television, having dinner and sleeping, alone and there she was accusing me of having jolly good times with someone else!
Only prayers and inner-self-strength made me continuously sane during this trying period. All the challenges that we had faced together made us persevere.
Then, just like that, everything change for the better. Sure, the tantrum of a jealous wife is still there, but it is of very much less severity than before.
Our intimacy, well we are now just like a newly wed couple. Our time spent together was quality time. It is no more robotic in nature, instead it is always full of life, zealousness and zest. In short, it will make newly weds run for their money if they do not excel in it!
Thanks Allah for bringing light to her and making her accept the way our life is at the moment. I just feel obligated to the students and the faculty. It is my responsibility to Allah to pass on what I am blessed with before they are lost with age.
After all she is the one and the only wife I have for now. I'll never leave her, let alone abuse her.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
I have been busy
A friend asked me why I had not been up-dating my blog for quite some time. Well, to tell you the truth, of late I have been busy with my Facebook instead.
It is just much simpler to jot a few words here and there rather on some people's wall or status than to write a story or an idea. I am so much engrossed with Fb that my children called me a grand stalker!
Also, I have been busy re-writing you know My Moments in the novel format. I am now in the last chapter. I am still thinking how to close it. It is difficult as life is still going on and there are so many things to write.
I am also busy searching for the right title for it. Anybody who can help me in coming up with an appropriate pulling title please put up your hand and give me your suggestion.
It is about my life, a son of a forever moving policeman, from 4 years old to the last few years of my life. There were animals in most parts of my moments.
To you publishers out there, or anyone who knows or has influence on any publishers interested in giving it a go with an autobiography that I think worth publishing and reading, please give me a tinkle. May be we can work something worthwhile for all.
Then I will be continue with my other two novels. They were almost complete, but need further editing.
It is just much simpler to jot a few words here and there rather on some people's wall or status than to write a story or an idea. I am so much engrossed with Fb that my children called me a grand stalker!
Also, I have been busy re-writing you know My Moments in the novel format. I am now in the last chapter. I am still thinking how to close it. It is difficult as life is still going on and there are so many things to write.
I am also busy searching for the right title for it. Anybody who can help me in coming up with an appropriate pulling title please put up your hand and give me your suggestion.
It is about my life, a son of a forever moving policeman, from 4 years old to the last few years of my life. There were animals in most parts of my moments.
To you publishers out there, or anyone who knows or has influence on any publishers interested in giving it a go with an autobiography that I think worth publishing and reading, please give me a tinkle. May be we can work something worthwhile for all.
Then I will be continue with my other two novels. They were almost complete, but need further editing.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Stem Cells
One morning during breakfast at a food stall in front of PGA Camp in Kubang Badak I overheard a group people from a table in front of me talking seriously about something. I did not mean to eavesdrop, but the topic was something I think I knew a bit to share with them.
It was about stem cells. They were talking about the use of umbilical cord stem cells (UCSC).
I then joined in the discussion from my table. "What are stem cells?" They asked me.
They are cells that have not differentiated fully and can form any specialized cells if the need arise. The first use of stem cells in treating disease is the use of bone marrow for the treatment of leukemia.
They seemed so interested in what I told them. They even invited me to give a talk on stem cells to their musola congregation. I said why not?
It was about stem cells. They were talking about the use of umbilical cord stem cells (UCSC).
I then joined in the discussion from my table. "What are stem cells?" They asked me.
They are cells that have not differentiated fully and can form any specialized cells if the need arise. The first use of stem cells in treating disease is the use of bone marrow for the treatment of leukemia.
They seemed so interested in what I told them. They even invited me to give a talk on stem cells to their musola congregation. I said why not?
Friday, December 23, 2011
Paper Chase - A New Illness
Our youngest made us proud today. She scored straight A's in her PMR, and so other 18 of her friends. They were from SMKSI, the oldest secondary school in Chukai.
I am very happy to see how jubilant they were, these high-achievers. So to were their proud parents.
However, I saw sad tears in two of her best friends. They scored 7 A's and 1 B. To them and many more who scored 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 and 7's they thought that they had done badly in PMR.
No, you haven't my dear. You have done very well, no matter what you feel and others think.
I saw a Chinese girl crying badly as she was not announced as one of the 19 who scored straight A's. She was so distraught that her mother and friends had to console her.
She was always a straight A students all these while. That's why. The pressure was so great on her to score straight A's. Scoring 6 or 7 A's was not sufficient for her, that was what she think.
The paper chase is fast putting unnecessary pressure on our children. If left unstopped, it will depress our less-mighty academic achievers.
It is not necessary to scoretraight A's to succeed in life!
Congratulation to all of your!
I am very happy to see how jubilant they were, these high-achievers. So to were their proud parents.
However, I saw sad tears in two of her best friends. They scored 7 A's and 1 B. To them and many more who scored 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 and 7's they thought that they had done badly in PMR.
No, you haven't my dear. You have done very well, no matter what you feel and others think.
I saw a Chinese girl crying badly as she was not announced as one of the 19 who scored straight A's. She was so distraught that her mother and friends had to console her.
She was always a straight A students all these while. That's why. The pressure was so great on her to score straight A's. Scoring 6 or 7 A's was not sufficient for her, that was what she think.
The paper chase is fast putting unnecessary pressure on our children. If left unstopped, it will depress our less-mighty academic achievers.
It is not necessary to scoretraight A's to succeed in life!
Congratulation to all of your!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
A Lady Crying
More often than not she gave me that please-help-me-if-you-can look. We also noticed that she once, I missed 'te in a while wiped the tears from her eyes. She was crying. Her eyes were red and swollen. The man with her, could not tell who he was to her, was in full big-biker's uniform - red and white leathing thing and boots.
He was very clear not showing any sympathy or empathy for her. All he was interested was communicating with someone else over his mobile. More than a few times now he walked away from the table just to talk in privacy with someone somewhere.
I was sure he was talking to another woman and he would not want her to hear what they were talking about.
She was not having anything to eat with him. She quickly changed from eating in to eating away.
A few minutes later and after Diyana's reminders for us not to be busy body, I missed the 'the end' of their melodrama. He was on his bike bike and she was quickly out of the Thai restaurant and out of our sight. But one thing very clear was that they departed from each other and went separate ways.
It was ironic- there we were celebrating our 29thwedding anniversary and just a few metres away, theye were separating!
He was very clear not showing any sympathy or empathy for her. All he was interested was communicating with someone else over his mobile. More than a few times now he walked away from the table just to talk in privacy with someone somewhere.
I was sure he was talking to another woman and he would not want her to hear what they were talking about.
She was not having anything to eat with him. She quickly changed from eating in to eating away.
A few minutes later and after Diyana's reminders for us not to be busy body, I missed the 'the end' of their melodrama. He was on his bike bike and she was quickly out of the Thai restaurant and out of our sight. But one thing very clear was that they departed from each other and went separate ways.
It was ironic- there we were celebrating our 29thwedding anniversary and just a few metres away, theye were separating!
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
In Memory of My Dad
It is still vivid in my mind how tears flowed freely from my dad's eyes when he finally broke the story to us all, the story that was so personal that not even my mother new it.
It all began one night when we all were immersed in another tear-jerking Malay drama on television.
Candidly these words blurted out of my sixteen-year-old mouth: "Dad, why didn't you ever go back home to your parents in Rembau? It is a great sin for a son not to visit his mom and dad..."
As sudden as the words came out, so too was his reaction to my probing questions.
"It is not like what you all are thinking. I am not an ungrateful son..."
He was all tears and sobbing terribly as he began to narrate his childhood story to us.
It all began when he felt that, probably because of his darker complexion, he was not loved as a son was expected to be loved by a father.
One night, just as his father came home, he heard his stepmother asked his father why didn't he give the job to my father.
"Why should I give the job to him? It is better for me to give it to somebody else."
The words nailed in deep into his young heart. He packed his things and got into a night train to JB.
In JB he was taken in by an auntie who raised him like her own son.
"I even share rice with others while working..."
None back home even reported to the police about him went missing...
..to be continued....
It all began one night when we all were immersed in another tear-jerking Malay drama on television.
Candidly these words blurted out of my sixteen-year-old mouth: "Dad, why didn't you ever go back home to your parents in Rembau? It is a great sin for a son not to visit his mom and dad..."
As sudden as the words came out, so too was his reaction to my probing questions.
"It is not like what you all are thinking. I am not an ungrateful son..."
He was all tears and sobbing terribly as he began to narrate his childhood story to us.
It all began when he felt that, probably because of his darker complexion, he was not loved as a son was expected to be loved by a father.
One night, just as his father came home, he heard his stepmother asked his father why didn't he give the job to my father.
"Why should I give the job to him? It is better for me to give it to somebody else."
The words nailed in deep into his young heart. He packed his things and got into a night train to JB.
In JB he was taken in by an auntie who raised him like her own son.
"I even share rice with others while working..."
None back home even reported to the police about him went missing...
..to be continued....
Some people have lost their sense of humility
Usually I do not pay much attention how another man behaves. For me it is up to him to act in any way he thinks best for him.
But, there is this man, a close relative of mine, who suddenly pisses me off whenever he is with us.
He is so uppity and outright show-offish that I just cannot tolerate him any more.
Yes, I know what he must be feeling right now. He must be at the top of the world, with all his children working and having a house bigger than many of us (except ours may be).
Well, may be it is his way of being thankful to God for the many blessings received.
The way he carries himself in public, the way he treats other people (me including) make me want to puke.
Sorry for being rude, but that is what I feel every time he opens his big mouth.
Imagine in a sad gathering recently, he went around telling people that soon one or two of his children will get married; and for each function, nothing less than 30K would be spent.
Why did he has to tell people that? Is he that filthy rich? I don't think so.
Another relative of mine who used to behave in almost similar fashion, is showing all the humility now.
That too not because he likes it, I think. But just because of the not-so-good economy right now.
He still go about doing things in grandeur style though.
Come on people, nobody is really rich when he still needs somebody to help him sometimes.
Why not be humble and keep in a low profile. A poisonous black mamba or Malaysian krait will not lose its poison just because it crawls along some lowly roots somewhere.
And a glass will always be a glass no matter how well and lavish you package it, but a diamond will still be a diamond and highly sought after by people even if it is deep in man's midnight soil!
But, there is this man, a close relative of mine, who suddenly pisses me off whenever he is with us.
He is so uppity and outright show-offish that I just cannot tolerate him any more.
Yes, I know what he must be feeling right now. He must be at the top of the world, with all his children working and having a house bigger than many of us (except ours may be).
Well, may be it is his way of being thankful to God for the many blessings received.
The way he carries himself in public, the way he treats other people (me including) make me want to puke.
Sorry for being rude, but that is what I feel every time he opens his big mouth.
Imagine in a sad gathering recently, he went around telling people that soon one or two of his children will get married; and for each function, nothing less than 30K would be spent.
Why did he has to tell people that? Is he that filthy rich? I don't think so.
Another relative of mine who used to behave in almost similar fashion, is showing all the humility now.
That too not because he likes it, I think. But just because of the not-so-good economy right now.
He still go about doing things in grandeur style though.
Come on people, nobody is really rich when he still needs somebody to help him sometimes.
Why not be humble and keep in a low profile. A poisonous black mamba or Malaysian krait will not lose its poison just because it crawls along some lowly roots somewhere.
And a glass will always be a glass no matter how well and lavish you package it, but a diamond will still be a diamond and highly sought after by people even if it is deep in man's midnight soil!
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