Friday, December 23, 2011

Paper Chase - A New Illness

Our youngest made us proud today. She scored straight A's in her PMR, and so other 18 of her friends. They were from SMKSI, the oldest secondary school in Chukai.

I am very happy to see how jubilant they were, these high-achievers. So to were their proud parents.

However, I saw sad tears in two of her best friends. They scored 7 A's and 1 B. To them and many more who scored 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 and 7's they thought that they had done badly in PMR.

No, you haven't my dear. You have done very well, no matter what you feel and others think.

I saw a Chinese girl crying badly as she was not announced as one of the 19 who scored straight A's. She was so distraught that her mother and friends had to console her.

She was always a straight A students all these while. That's why. The pressure was so great on her to score straight A's. Scoring 6 or 7 A's was not sufficient for her, that was what she think.

The paper chase is fast putting unnecessary pressure on our children. If left unstopped, it will depress our less-mighty academic achievers.

It is not necessary to scoretraight A's to succeed in life!

Congratulation to all of your!

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

A Lady Crying

More often than not she gave me that please-help-me-if-you-can look. We also noticed that she once, I missed 'te in a while wiped the tears from her eyes. She was crying. Her eyes were red and swollen. The man with her, could not tell  who he was to her, was in full big-biker's uniform - red and white leathing thing and boots.
He was very clear not showing any sympathy or empathy for her. All he was interested was communicating with someone else over his mobile. More than a few  times now he walked away from the table just to talk in privacy with someone somewhere.
I was sure he was talking to  another woman and he would not want her to hear what they were talking about.
She was not having anything to eat with him. She quickly changed from eating in to eating away.
A few minutes later and after Diyana's reminders for us not to be busy body, I missed the 'the end' of their melodrama. He was on his bike bike and she was quickly out of the Thai restaurant and out of our sight. But one thing very clear was that they departed from each other and went separate ways.
It was ironic- there we were celebrating our 29thwedding anniversary and just a few metres away, theye were separating!

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

In Memory of My Dad

It is still vivid in my mind how tears flowed freely from my dad's eyes when he finally broke the story to us all, the story that was so personal that not even my mother new it.

It all began one night when we all were immersed in another tear-jerking Malay drama on television. 

Candidly these words blurted out of my sixteen-year-old mouth: "Dad, why didn't you ever go back home to your parents in Rembau? It is a great sin for a son not to visit his mom and dad..."

As sudden as the words came out, so too was his reaction to my probing questions.

"It is not like what you all are thinking. I am not an ungrateful son..."

He was all tears and sobbing terribly as he began to narrate his childhood story to us.

It all began when he felt that, probably because of his darker complexion, he was not loved as a son was expected to be loved by a father.

One night, just as his father came home, he heard his stepmother asked his father why didn't he give the job to my father.

"Why should I give the job to him? It is better for me to give it to somebody else."

The words nailed in deep into his young heart. He packed his things and got into a night train to JB.

In JB he was taken in by an auntie who raised him like her own son.

"I even share rice with others while working..."

None back home even reported to the police about him went missing... be continued....


Some people have lost their sense of humility

Usually I do not pay much attention how another man behaves. For me it is up to him to act in any way he thinks best for him.

But, there is this man, a close relative of mine, who suddenly pisses me off whenever he is with us.

He is so uppity and outright show-offish that I just cannot tolerate him any more.

Yes, I know what he must be feeling right now. He must be at the top of the world, with all his children working and having a house bigger than many of us (except ours may be).

Well, may be it is his way of being thankful to God for the many blessings received.

The way he carries himself in public, the way he treats other people (me including) make me want to puke.

Sorry for being rude, but that is what I feel every time he opens his big mouth.

Imagine in a sad gathering recently, he went around telling people that soon one or two of his children will get married; and for each function, nothing less than 30K would be spent.

Why did he has to tell people that? Is he that filthy rich? I don't think so.

Another relative of mine who used to behave in almost similar fashion, is showing all the humility now.

That too not because he likes it, I think. But just because of the not-so-good economy right now.

He still go about doing things in grandeur style though.

Come on people, nobody is really rich when he still needs somebody to help him sometimes.

Why not be humble and keep in a low profile. A poisonous black mamba or Malaysian krait will not lose its poison just because it crawls along some lowly roots somewhere.

And a glass will always be a glass no matter how well and lavish you package it, but a diamond will still be a diamond and highly sought after by people even if it is deep in man's midnight soil! 

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

My Mother

There she was, sitting on her favourite easy chair. She was always on that chair whenever we visited her.

I held her hands and kissed them. I gently hugged her. She was literally only skin and bone.

Her facial expression was mixed; sometimes it was just like a child longing for a friend, but some other times she was just like her own self.

"Who's this?"


"How many children you have?"


"Can you name them?"

"Siti Aminah...I can't..I'm confused.."

"What about the nine of us? Who is the eldest?"

"Sutie...I can't...too many branches..."

She could not remember the order we came into being into this world.

She did not know what time it was too.

She recognize all of us and her close friends who came visiting.

 She has lost most of her memories...she is having Al-Zheimer...

That's my mother...

To Allah I pray that she will be happy no matter what condition she is in...

I love you mom...

Monday, September 12, 2011

The majority of alveoli are markedly distended with neutrophils, macrophages, fibrillar eosinophilic material (fibrin) and  cellular debris.

Most pulmonary blood vessels are markedly congested with erythrocytes admixed with moderate amount of neutrophils, some of which are migrating across the vessel wall into the alveoli.

That is what I have seen in a piece of a cow's lung section under a light microscope.

There is a big battle going on in it, a war between some infectious bacteria, Pasteurella spp. that have infected the cow's lung and the cow's immune system.

The presence of the invading bacteria has triggered a great defence mechanism involving the neutrophils, the macrophages and a myriad of chemicals produced by the cow.

This is what I have been looking at, examining and appreciating for the past 15 years or more.

It is the microscopic world.

Do you wonder who orchestrate all that is going on in there?

Don't tell me that it happens by itself?

The greatest Creator of them all must have done that. It is all ALLAH's work ensuring that there is equilibrium in there, in the microscopic world!

Allah is great!


Tuesday, August 23, 2011


Today is 23 rd Ramadhan. In a week's time Muslims the world over will celebrate Eid.

As usual with us Malays, Eid is something very special.

We celebrate it with grandeur and lavishness.

Preparation for Eid is usually made early. Families are usually busy purchasing new clothes for their family members. It is uncommon for lady folks to buy 2, 3 or sometimes more pairs of the traditional Baju Kurung.

And they also prepare cookies well ahead of time.

Times like this some have already taken their leaves to make the final preparation.

That is why it is all quiet in the office....

Monday, August 22, 2011


The yellow palm trees are busy fruiting. Fruit bunches are sprouting all over despite of my constant plucking.

Peeking from a window from the master bedroom, I see Yellow-vented bulbul parents coaching their fledglings on the techniques of choosing the succulent fruits for lunch.

One fledgling is very good at it, picking and eating, just like its parents. Its fluffy body tells me that it has been eating well.

Coming and go, hopping from one frond to another, sometimes irritating the bulbuls, are the forever active Glossy starlings.

I have noticed that these shiny dark green to black (depending from what angle you are watching) birds have been relocating their nests from trees to my roof.

I frequently find dead nestlings in or near the drain. They and the bats are sharing our roof as their roosting place.

These bats give me the creep. I have place lights in my roof, but they are still there.

Monday, August 15, 2011


Ramadhan is the month where ALLAH promise forgiveness, blessings and many other good things for us.

The greatest gift of them all is the Lailatulkadar - that special night. The night which is said to be among the last 10 days of Ramadhan.

The night that will bring many blessings to those who follow what have been ordered.

The night that will make us live longer even though physically we die at 70.

But, sadly the majority of us are too busy preparing for Aidilfitri during this period.

Mosques are relatively emptier compared to the early part of Ramadhan or the Nisfu Syaaban.

What a waste!

Sunday, August 14, 2011


Diyana was back from a two-week tour of duty in Uzbekistan and Dubai.

She came back with a few grams of Saffron (bought both in Tashkent and Dubai and much to the surprise of her friends that she was really serious looking for it), a few bayas (is it spelled that way? - jubah), Uzbek's sweets and other what nots.

Soon she was busy telling stories of her visit..things like they have different breaking fast time between floors on the world's tallest building in Dubai and about a special shop where every other Malaysian visitor frequented, even HRH The Agong.

Welcome back least for now..for I know soon you will be going places again..that is what you have been dreaming of...


Without any reason a motorcycle suddenly ran against the back of my car.

All I heard was a knock on the rear bumper of my car as I neared Impiana Resort Cherating.

I saw a motorcyclist and his girl friend tumbling down hard on the road in the left side mirror.

"Here it goes again." I said to myself.

I gradually brought my car to a stop a few metres away, avoiding the water melons.

I got out of the car to have a look at the damage.

The left rear light was shattered to pieces. There were also scratch marks on the bumper cover.

A group of motorcyclist quickly formed at the site of the accident. A storm was brewing.

I quickly summoned Syazwan to help equalize the tension.

A boy motorcyclist approached me and asked:"How to settle the this thing?" What he meant was how much I should pay for the accident.

"Who knocked who here? He ran against my car..he should pay!"

But, here in Malaysia, we car drivers cannot claim damages from motorcyclist!

I have to pay the damage from my own car insurance and my 55% NCD!

And I have to pay the full premium come this December!

Monday, August 1, 2011


This morning as I was entering the City of Kuala Terengganu, a driver of the car in front of me suddenly put on her alarm lights and drove left onto the road reserve.

Smoke came out of the engine of her car.

I saw flame in her engine. Bits and pieces of burning debris fell down onto the ground beneath her car.

Her car was on fire!


Time really flies. Without we realizing it, it is already the first Ramadhan today.

All Muslims the world over, irrespective of their ethnicity and financial and social standings, start fasting on the first Ramadhan.

Ramadhan fasting consists of much more than merely going off food and water.

We are required to distant ourselves from all that corrode our fast. There are too many things that will do just that for me to detail it out here.

Our Prophet said that many of us who fast just get hungry and thirst only.

Why did He said that? 

Because that is what most of us did during Ramadhan...abstaining from food and water, but the eyes see, the ears hear and the mouth says all those that we are not supposed to see, hear and say.

Ramadhan fasting has a few levels, from that of the man-on-the-street fasting to that of the Prophets' fasting.

We are required to improve our level of fasting year by year and not just remaining status quo...

One personal observation that warrants our attention is our too great a love for food during iftar. 

I think we spend too much time and money on all those food and drink items.

At iftar, we quickly gobbled in as much food and liquid as we could.

We waste too much food too.

And we also think too much of the Idilfitri.

Happy fasting and may our fast will be accepted by Allah and it will be a better one this year.

Thursday, July 7, 2011


July is here again. It was the month where my late son, Khairul Syakirin or just Adik to us, and I were born.

I was born a day earlier than adik (of course different years), that was on the 22 nd July.

And it was also in July, or 10th of July to be exact, adik left us all. He was called to be among His beloved past midnight July 10 at HKL after suffering from Acute Lymphoblastic Leukimia (ALL) for more than a year.

And today my wife text me asking me for the exact date adik passed away. Well, I don't blame her..It has been 20 years now since he passed away.

July has been and still is a special month to me.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011


Here I am all alone after office. No one to talk to or to accompany me for dinner, except when the Dean call for either dinner or breakfast.

Sleeping alone at night is the worst torture for a pensioner like me.

With only the television as my companion, that too with an Astro with a limited programme, I while away time before I fall asleep, either on the sofa or on the bare bed.

As far as my sleeping time is concerned, well, it depends on how tired I am at the time. It may be as early as 8.30 or as late as 2.30 in the morning.

It is all up to me to fall asleep. There is nobody to ask me to go to sleep.

Waking up is different. I always wake up a few minutes before the hp alarm goes off, at 5.45 am. 

Yet, I am still accused of being either on the phone most of the time or having a romantic dinner with someone special.

No matter what, I am all alone again, naturally....

Monday, July 4, 2011


No one is guilty of his or her thought. No sin is committed if it is not yet implemented. That is what ISLAM teaches us, not something coming out of my mouth.

So, it is ludicrous, to say the least, to arrest someone wearing a T-shirt with something written on it, something that is so innocent such as the word 'Bersih'.

I am no politician, but being an altruist and a strict defender of the innocents and the underdogs, I detest all forms of actions that are not according to the Law. I hate it when the 'strong' act on the weak just because they fear of the weak wrestling away their power.

I have seen it all. How a peaceful rally turned ugly after it was provoked.

All I want of my country is to respect its citizens' right to voice their feeling, even though it may not be pleasant to the government.

I want MALAYSIA to be a first class country in all aspects of life.

Let them be. Allow them to rally peacefully. Be tough with them only, and only if they become unruly.

Saturday, June 18, 2011


Then there were three, now there are none. Yes, I have no incisors and pre-molars on my lower jaw. All that I have now on my lower jaw are two molars on each side.

Even my upper jaw, the teeth are just waiting their turn to be extracted.

Now I can hardly chew on anything. Imagine having no upper molars and with only four lower molars there is nothing much I can do as far as chewing is concerned.

Now, or was it long time ago, I have lost the joy of chewing good food. Like other good things, we appreciate them only when we lost them.

I have lost the chewing and tasting all those good food. Even my favourite cashew nuts now taste plain since I can't chew them.

Now all I have to do is wait for the gum to shrink before I can put on my dentures.

Thursday, June 16, 2011


My breadfruit is already matured. I can tell it by looking at the colour of its skin. It is slightly yellowish compared to the bright green of the immature one.

But, it is way up there, on the highest branch. I have to use the ladder and a pole to bring it down. With a slight push there it is, thumping down on the ground..

It was light and a bit soft to the touch.

I cut in into two longitudinal halves and begin to skin it. Then I slice it into a few 1-cm thick wedges and soak them into salt water.

My wife then deep fries the wedges till golden brown and crispy.

They make wonderful snack. As good, or even better tasting than the deep-fried yam or sweet potatoes.


This morning as I was sending Amalia to school, a very beautiful sight caught our eyes. It was a rare but a sight that would remain for a long time in our minds, especially a nature lover like me.

A mama and papa White-breasted water hens (wak wak) were crossing the road in a semi-hurry with four chicks following close behind in a line. They were still in their jet-black down feathers.

I am very happy. You want to know why? Their presence shows that the environment around Taman Samudera Timur is still pristine enough to support a family of waterhens.

I have not seen such a sight for a very long time now. It is my pray that the chicks will not fall prey to some mischievous kids or predators like the civet cats and grow to be beautiful adult waterhens like their parents.

I remember chasing after them when I was a kid very long time ago. But now I do not do that anymore. I rather see them free anytime compared to keeping them in a closure like many people prefer.

Good luck waterhens. May you continue to live happily in the what-ever-remaining bushes...

Thursday, June 9, 2011


I am supposed to drive around almost the entire Peninsular Malaysia from the 12 to 22 June to check up on our students doing their Industrial training at several institutions and farms.

Then the dean told me to get my passport ready. We are going to Medan from 16 to 19 June. So Medan here I come. 

I had to renew my passport as it is expiring in August. For that I had to pay RM300 for the five-year new passport. 

For that I have to reschedule my visit. May be I can finish it before the end of June.

But the main issue lingering in my mind is Diyana's departure date to Turkeministan. When is it exactly? She told me this morning that it would be sometimes next week.

Don't tell me I should just let her go to a foreign country for a three-week duty without seeing her off? I do pray that I will have time to do just that before I leave for Medan.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011


It is just too much to call the legally wedded wife as a 'First class prostitute' no matter from what angle you look at it. That was what I have read of late about a movement to train women as better wives.

How low can you stoop to equate the role of a wife as that of the world's oldest profession.

Sex is just a part of marriage, not the sole purpose of the amalgamation of a man and a woman!

The problem lies actually in the denial syndrome that frowns at a husband who wants to take another wife.

Taking a second, third or fourth wife is completely legal from the point of view of Islam, if he can be just to all of them.

Having a second wife is regarded as a crime or even a sin by the majority of wives. To them, it is an act of not loving one's wife any more, unfaithful.

Actually, to be honest about it, it is any man's nature to have the intention or desire of having two, three or four wives. It is just that this and economic considerations that makes him reconsider his intention.

To many, it is his wife and probably his off-springs' rejection that make him forget about his desire, though deep inside him it is that he actually wants, especially when he wants more in a woman than mere sex.

So, come on stop being a hypocrite. Know and understand one's husband's right and not make him choose between you and her.

It is not that his love for you has gone with the passing years, it is just that he wants the love of another woman.

Why not share, rather than keeping his love just for yourself? Knowing well (though you never want to admit it) that you now cannot any longer meet his demand of attention and love.

To husbands, don't take this as a signal that you can marry another woman wantonly.

I am just suggesting that it is all right to marry more that one wife provided your intention is clear, and you are sure you can provide justice in your marriage.

I am just requesting for the women folks to seriously think about it rationally, without jumping to the ceiling just because their husband says that he is planning to marry another woman.

It is allowed by Islam. Why prevent something that is permissible and at the same time letting some thing that is not permitted to go on unabated like no one cares - free relationship between the opposite sex that lead to so many social ills like baby dumping.



Yes, we have moved. All members of the Faculty of Agriculture and Biotechnology have moved to the new but rather poorly finished building in Kubang Badak Campus (or more popularly known as KUSZA campus). 

The latest news is that even the Biotechnology department has received the marching order even though initially it is understood that they will stay put.

As usual, I was the first to move, that was on Thursday itself. There was nothing much to move except papers that I have to keep. I did it by myself, carrying a little at a time using two traveling bags into my car.

For me the new office is more comfortable. I do not have to drive long in the morning. It just takes me 5 minutes to reach office.

The only problem here is that Facebook is off limit. I do not know why, but they block the usage of Facebook. I just cannot understand the real issue behind this. Thus, I am lonely up here for the time being, much to the like of my wife!

Tuesday, June 7, 2011


She has been diagnosed with the end-stage renal failure. Not long after that her eye-sight went bad - retinopathy. All these because of her neglected diabetes.

She could not see details anymore. All she could see is blurry images.

She was also weak and could hardly walk without people's help. Her mind too suffers as the result of her condition.

The question is, who is going to look after her in the long run? My wife? I don't think so she has the energy to do it day in and day out. You know her, her own household chores already tire her body.

Her only son, well I don't think he is dependable in that respect. He has been pampered too much to know what to do without being repeatedly asked.

Her husband too. Up to now he still thinks that his wife is going to recover soon. It has never come to him that his wife may require much longer time to recover or may never recover at all.

They, as a family, have to change the way they live. Now they have an important member incapacitated, may be for life.

I do pray that her condition improves soon. As I just cannot envision how their life going to be without her being active.


Our residence is not as luxurious as other bungalows, but it is blessed with flora and fauna soothing to the eyes and mind. 

Would you believe me if I say that the trees inside our compound provide shelter and foraging ground for not less than half a dozen bird species.

Let me introduce you to the trees that I have planted in our housing compound. They are Moringa oleifera (there are six of them the last time I counted them), mango, breadfruit, water apple, banana, bamboo, yellow palm, and many other flowering plants.

That mango tree is very special as it bears two kinds of fruit - the huge apple mango and the 'pauh' variety. Right now it is flowering, budding and fruiting too.

The breadfruit tree is also busily fruiting. In fact I have just tried two last weekend and they are indeed tasty when deep-fried.

The banana tree (given by a lorry driver) seems never want to grow tall at all. Suddenly it surprised everybody when it began bearing fruit last two weeks.

As they fruit, birds come by the dozen to feed or play. Yellow-vented bulbuls are always busy harvesting palm fruits or chasing insects among leaves.

Glossy Philippines Starlings have found crevices in the house interesting enough to build their nests in. They must be competing for space with the nuisance bed-bug-bearing bats!

Tiny cute little tailor birds are always busy hopping on the chain-link fence or on the twigs going after flying insects or crawling caterpillars. I have yet to see their nest till now.

Magpie robins are always the first to wake up, even earlier than me. Before dawn prayer, they start to sing on top of the roof. When two males meet, their song can go on forever.

In short, our residence is indeed a nature's gallery where human dwellers and flora and fauna interact making life interesting...Welcome to our residence!



As I drove past SK Pusat. my alma mater, my mind suddenly flashes back to a scenario sometimes 45 years back.

It was a hot sunny afternoon after school. There I was, cycling back from school under the punishing hot sun. It was a relatively new Raleigh bicycle.

The distance, well it was well over 6 miles from the school to Kg Bukit Kuang.

The road was not as busy as it is now. We could hardly see any cars passing by. Only timber lorries were making full use of the road to bring the bounty from the forest to sawmills. They, especially the empty ones were really the kings of the road then.

As far as I could remember there were only three cars in Chukai then. One was owned by the late Syed Noh and the other two, well, I have forgotten who the owners were, but I know for sure that once in a while I did hitch a ride in one of them two to school.

Six miles was easy for me back then. No sweat. But knowing well that something delicious was waiting for me at my late aunt whom I called Mak Long, in Kg Besut, I usually stop at her house for lunch. Still vivid in my mind how I criss-crossed the roads in Kg Besut before making it to the main road.

In youthful zealousness I got was involved in a few little road mishaps in Kg Besut. One was when I ran over the back of an old male muscovy duck. The duck was ok. It was me who came tumbling down and hit the jagged edge of the road. My knee was wide open and I just laid there in great pain. Cikgu Taha came to my rescue. After cleaning my wounds and repairing mr bicycle's handles, there I was speeding home, asif nothing had ever happened.

The second incident occurred on the way to school. As I was speeding away, out of a corner I saw a motorcycle crossing the junction. As it was so near to me, I just rammed into the back tyre and fell down. The
motorcycle rider stopped and helped me up. I continued my way to school after getting my bicycle handles realligned.

A rude driver overtaking me at a dangerous corner brings me back to the present world. I pressed the gas paddle slightly and the car speeds on chasing the Proton saga.

Monday, May 30, 2011


There she was, having her kittens right smack on our old sofa on our patio. There were six of them, tiny little creatures with eye still closed.

The queen was barely an adult..still too young to have babies. She just came to our residence as soon as we moved in, that was more than three years ago.

With a twist of misfortunes, the queen was ran over as I reversed my car. It was indeed a very tragic incident. She quickly ran over her kittens as soon as she realized that her life in this world was nearing the end.

She looked at her kittens with sad eyes as she breathed her last breath. She was dead, right in front of her newborn kittens.

With her passing, the kittens were sort of left on their own. To cut the story short, only him (known as Stocking) survived to adulthood.

But, with no mother to teach him the way of life for a cat, he was far from a male cat that he was supposed to be. He missed most of the things that cats do.

He became a cat too dependent on us to give him food and love.

As everybody was busy with their own life - Kamal was married and moved out of the house,  Syafiq was too busy with his work and I was busy with my work in UniSZA, Stocking was left to survive in the cat's harsh world all by itself.

A rogue tomcat chased and bloodied him every time they came face to face. I remember seeing him high up the grill of our sliding door, sometimes twisting his legs, just to be away from the sharp teeth and claws of the muscular tomcat.

Then, as he was almost adult, it was his turn to bully that tomcat, who by now was so frail and sickly. It was sheer joy to see him giving his old enemy the chase. then that old tomcat disappeared, probably died somewhere.

With that old tomcat gone, Stocking's life became much easier. There was no other cat that could bully him. He was the king of the neighbourhood.

Suddenly he became anorectic. He did not want to eat anything my wife gave him, not even his favourite deep-fried golden-striped trevally (selar kuning).

Then one day I found him sprawled at the edge of my garage, very weak and emaciated. There was blood oozing out of his nostrils and mouth. He was dying. Fifteen minutes later, Stocking was no more with us. he has passed away at the age of just above three years.

Syafiq buried him beneath the busily fruiting mango tree. Stocking was no more with us, but with his mom and siblings....

Wednesday, May 18, 2011


Our dwarf banana tree suddenly bore fruits. I remember planting it many months ago under the mango tree at a corner of our lawn. All these while, I kept it just because of its leaves, It supplied us with banana leaves for grilling fish.

Then, a few days ago, there it was, busily fruiting.

On the opposite corner, my bread-fruit tree (sukun) also gave us a big surprise. It too was bearing fruits, 8 to be exact. All these while its fallen leaves kept me busy during my weekends.

Bread-fruit has been my favourite since I was introduced to bread-fruit fritters long time ago by a boy-seller at Chow Kitt road.

I hope these are signs of good things to come in our lives. 

Wednesday, May 4, 2011


I am both surprised and angry at a few road signs near Kijal asking road-users to be careful of uneven road surface ahead.

Angry because they have been there for ages. Usually, such road signs are up temporarily until the damage is repaired. But, no, they are still there and look like to remain there for a long time to come.

And the unplanned bumps are still there, causing many car rims of unwary drivers become crooked as they speed along.

What frustrate me further is that they have the money to smoothen the so-called uneven surface, but they choose not to do so. I just wonder why.

Are they waiting for another road carnage before they do something?

Or are they waiting for the next general election?

Monday, May 2, 2011


I was pretty deep in facebook. I felt pretty free expressing what I felt at various issues raised by fb friends.Until I wrote down simple cheeky words to a brother of mine. The words were: "Who's that brother? Is there anything.?" Then all hell broke loose.

I was accused of trying to break-up a marriage. Despite of my explanation, he still said that I was the one responsible for his rocking marriage. I vehemently denied. I have used fiercer words before, without any jealousy or fights before. I was informed much later that a laptop was broken to pieces soon after.

Then there was this fb friend who was going on a meeting in Riau, Indonesia. I texted him wishing him bon voyage. Then, unexplainably and out of no where, a lady fb friend  answered and the text read: "Thanks 'abang'...I'm at LCCT.."

Then a war, just short of the third world war,  broke out. I was attacked relentlessly by the lady folks in the family. Why? Just because of the word 'abang' that I thought was mistakenly sent to me?

I was accused of having an extra-marital affair, flirting with a girl of my daughter's age, being an itchy old man  and other what nots that were too dirty to be mentioned here.

I tried to explain, but failed miserably. I chose to remain quiet. I quit fb for good just to pacify the raging fire.

"Is it there any truth in people saying that fb is one of the great causes of marriage break-ups?"

 What say you?

Wednesday, April 6, 2011


When I first thought of joining the university, all I wanted to do was just giving lectures to students. That's it, just lectures and nothing else.
No more administrative works for me.
But that, like so many things in life, remained as a wish.
I don't blame anybody for this, just like my father rightfully said:"It is what you want..your choice".
With just two full-time lecturers in the entire department at the moment, what do you expect? I really don't mind having 3 solid subjects to lecture on, provided there is help around and adequate facilities.
Two of my tutors, who had helped a lot in laboratory works, have now gone to Glasgow for their PhD. They will not be back till they have finished their study and that will be in 4-5 years time.
Commuting from my house to City and KUSZA campuses can be outright uncomfortable, especially knowing well that there will not be a parking space waiting for me when I come back.
Well, I am just voicing my feelings, that is all. I am thankful to Allah for giving me this job. But being a mere mortal, I too can get tired and fed up with all the inadequacies and mind you, I am no more a robust young man like I used to be those days.
And this irritating, hacking and non-productive cough lingers on. The cough worsens at night time. I just could not sleep as easily as before any more. Now I realize that there goes one more of the numerous blessings from Allah...falling to sleep every where as long as I want to.
I pray to Allah that I still have the energy and zest to provide for the next 8 years!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Lousy food

It is always frustrating, to say the least, when the food I order is not to the standard that I expect. What more if it is from a well-patronized food joint.

The food is either tasteless and far from the original taste that kind of food is supposed to taste. It is just incorrigible that a simple dish like 'nasi goreng ikan masin' turns out to be either so stale or too oily and there was no salted fish anywhere!

The same things goes to seafood tomyam. Where is the sour and hot taste? Where is the seafood? All I taste is the sour taste of vinegar and not the lime. And the sea food - aha! only pieces of squid heads and tails.

The rice, it is terrible. I know and understand well that they want to make as much money as possible from their operation, but please once in a while try to look and taste your rice.

Thursday, February 3, 2011


A pious man once told me that an angel of blessing will visit our home and spread his wings over our house as soon as we plan to have a feast. But the minute we start counting how much money we could get from the feast, the angel will fold his wings and leave us.

To get the full benefit of holding a feast, the intention must be clear - to get the blessing of Allah. Of course the procedure mus be right too.

All people, irrespective of social standing, should be invited and not discrimiated in the seating. It is said that it is not mandatory for us to attend a feast if the host does not invite poor people.

The culture of giving money to the host after a feast is fast becoming a must for guests. The sight of the host standing in front of the house wearing 'baju Melayu' with pockets full of money is common.

I don't mind giving, but what I do not like is the fact that when the feast is heald at the middle of the month, when there is not much 'excess money' is present in the family. What then? Rather than being embarassed with coming empty-handed, many choose not to attend.

In a state that I won't mention here, it goes further. The host prepares a notebook and records down the names of guests and how much he/she gives. When asked, they said that it is for them to pay back to the guest when they hold a similar feast.

I have also come across a host who openly declares that they do not expect guests to give money or present during the feast. They think that their good intention of holding the feats will be nullified if they accept the money.

No matter what, all I am hoping is both the gusest and the host should be clear of their intention and not to go overboard in their action.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011


It is sad, or rather depressing to see good people go down or in the position to go down and not-so-good people go up and up the socioeconomic ladder, as if no one cares.

Being an under-dog siding party and altruist, I just can't help but silently pray that they will get what they are supposed to get pretty soon.

To those not-so-good people who are at the helm, please once in a while look down. You may fall flat with a thumping blow on your ego one of these days.

The power you have now is really not yours. It is just lent to you to see how well you manage it.

You may go around, making promises along the way. So much promise you have made that you have lost count of any of them. But, remember those whom you have promised will never forget.

They will curse you for going against your promise. Remember, the doa of a victimized person, there is no barrier between him and Allah.

You have also amassed wealth, abused your position for personal and relative gains. You may have also closed one eye towards someone who needs your help badly to continue what he has been doing.

Instead of giving them a helping hand, you poison them. You intentionally find ways to see they suffer, to see they go down.

Imagine how much money, time and energy they have put towards their venture. You came and made promises. You went home leaving your sweet promises along the way.

You cut short their opportunity and laugh at their misfortune.

You gather more richness with the passing time. For you know damn well that your time is numbered.

You don't care whose feet you step on, whose feelings you hurt, as long as you reach your goal, your unquenchable greed for more and more wealth.

Finally, let me tell you this - as always life is a cycle. Now you are at the top, tomorrow you will be at the bottom. And when that time come, there will be no one to help you up.

You'll be all alone. The physical materials you have gathered while you are in power means nothing anymore. Your children, well I wonder whether you have treated them well or not. Your wife too. Was she properly looked after?

To the underdogs out there please remember that you're never alone. Out there somewhere there will be underdog-lovers who will help you when you need it most.

The time is now, or at the latest very soon. You will, once again see the light.

Monday, January 31, 2011


Yesterday was the first day for Syazwan to collect his blood for liver enzymes monitoring at Kemaman District Hospital. The procedure was reasonably fast. It was all over before 11.00.

Thinking that it would be normal or improved, we did not pay much attention to him collecting his blood results that afternoon. So Syazwan just drove to the hospital while I was ready for Australian Open men's final and the ladies, oh they all went to Mesra mall in Kemasik.

Then Syazwan called. His Potassium level was way high. So too were his ALP. He was immediately warded.

The first thing that I asked from the staff nurse as I arrived was for him to be put in the first or second class.

"Sorry sir, District hospitals do not have first or second class wards. All we have are third class wards!"

So, Syazwan had to bear with the crammed-in condition of the ward.

Friday, January 28, 2011


Sorry for not up-dating my blog for quite sometimes. I just did not have anything worth writing so far.

Then my son, Khairul Syazwan, over in UiTM Shah Alam called. He had just had his back x-rayed...there was nothing broken, just soft tissue damage perhaps. He was given muscle relaxant tablets

That night again he called, this time telling me that his urine was red in colour! I told him to go back to the medical centre. He did just that and was given antibiotics.

The following morning again he called me telling me that his eyes were yellow and he was very tired. I asked him to go to the clinic again immediately.

The doctor there suspected that he was suffering from acute hepatitis and asked him to be sent to Hospital Klang. I called him to change it to HKL instead and so on that Wednesday afternoon he was sent to Ward 27 HKL.

I told my head department about his health problem and was asked to go to my son immediately. So I drove down to Kemaman and got ready to drive to HKL the following morning.

Syazwan was intensely yellow! Even his dark skin could not hide the yellowing effect of bilirubin. A quick discussion with a doctor told me that it was an acute hepatitis.

A band of tests were carried out...hepatitis A, B, C; Leptospirosis, Malaria, Epstein Barr Virus...all were negative, much to the surprise of the doctors.

Ultrasound examination showed that his liver, bile ducts and pancreas were normal. There was no gall stones. But his liver enzymes continued on the increase trend. That worried the attending doctors.

Finally doctors and a pharmacist thought that it was probably drug-induced hepatitis. Myonal, a muscle relaxant, may be the culprit.

Cousins and friends visited him while he was in the ward. Even parents of his friend came all the way from Gombak to see him.

After more than a week in the hospital, his condition improved. He was very happy. His liver enzymes and bilirubin was beginning to show a decreasing trend. The doctors agreed to discharge him.

He was to see the nearest hospital to have his enzymes level monitored twice weekly.

So on Thursday afternoon I drove him home much to the delight of his mom and little sister.

Welcome home Acik and may you recover fully. Syukur Alhamdulillah for bringing back his health so soon.